Wednesday, January 24, 2007

children

The latest about the missing Rachel's is that they've "disappeared themselves," meaning that they haven't been abducted. For whatever reason, they've decided to leave home. I have no idea who Babka is and certainly no idea who the families of the two girls are.

What disturbed me the most in Babka's post is:

The family isn't taking phone calls from anyone but the police. There is nothing that any of us can do but respect their privacy and pray for their daughter's return and their continued strength.
Chazal (our sages) say that their are three things we have no control over

when we're born
where we're born
who our parents are
And if you take this a step further, you can also see that we can't control our children. G-d ultimately decides if and when we have children and what their natures and talents will be. We have to work with that, but each child is a person with his or her own special uniqueness. Sometimes that means that they become everything we dreamt they should be, and sometimes they become something else.

The truth is that we can't fight it, or we destroy them or our relationship with them. At times it may be unpleasant but we must make accommodations, and then they will, too. Worrying about what the neighbors say isn't healthy in any sense.

Chazal also say that the Temple will be rebuilt when we practice unconditional love and acceptance to all Jews, instead of baseless hatred. And we must start within our own families.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't understand what concerns you. What does the fact that they are not taking calls mean that they don't respect their children? Maybe they just don't want media attention? At any rate, I'm sure they are under a lot of stress and I wouldn't read too much into their actions at this point.

Batya said...

It said that they're only talking to the police.
It really could be that community members aren't being sympathetic and supportive.
At times of crises you see who your real friends are.

Anonymous said...

The family is now taking calls from their closest friends and family. An email from the mother was forwarded to me this afternoon saying they have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of support and offers of help. They are grateful that the news of the girls is being spread via email and blog - hopefully reaching someone who will see them and guide them home. Our synagogue has been fielding calls from as far as California offering prayers and support.

Batya said...

wonderful news

It's such a difficult situation. There are societies and personalities which take more "permanent" steps. G-d willing the girls and their families will make peace.